A while back, Jennifer Aniston had come out with a blog post about women who are labelled incomplete if they are not married or have children.
At that time my first thought was not about how much I agreed with her post, but why did she find the need to give an explanation.
Yesterday, I found out the hard way. Someone I know and value the opinion of, told me that I would never understand certain things because I am not a 'complete' woman.
I am not married with kids. This has been a personal decision of mine that was made a long time ago. I don't want to get married, at least for now. I don't feel like I need to be pressurized into thinking that I should marry in order to fit into society. I have dreams and ambitions for myself and I don't think I need to be labeled selfish, cold or naive because I don't think marriage would work for me.
When I heard this comment, I had prepared myself to be under harsh scrutiny from people I would have no relationship with. It's easier to dismiss ruthlessness when it's coming from someone who isn't even a small part of your life.
When it comes from someone who you thought understood what you wanted from life, the words slice through your heart.
It was a heart breaking moment to discover that I was being deemed incomplete and therefore unsuccessful because I wasn't ticking all the items on a checklist that would somehow crown me a winner.
After my initial reaction (that was tears), I was reminded by Jennifer Aniston's words and how it was okay to be whatever you want to be and do whatever you want with your life.
The road is paved with taunts and cruel comments, and it isn't easy to stick by my decisions and not give into pressure.
I do believe marriage works for people, not just me. I do love kids, but I also understand that I am not ready to have my own yet. And I should feel okay by this decision and not insulted for thinking differently.
I am a human being who wants to make something of herself someday.
And yesterday was a harsh lesson in building a thick skin. It's always going to be hard but I know that I have to think of the bigger picture.
If in a couple of years I do want these things for myself, then it would be my decision.
As of now, all I want is to be treated like a human being who has feelings and who is capable or getting hurt and is trying so hard to do something with her life.
The year is ending with this thought running through my mind.
Hoping for positivity and tolerance in the next year.