Horror Horoscope--April 6th to April 12th
Welcome to your Weekly Horror Horoscope, where the stars align with screams and the cosmos whispers chilling secrets! This week's astrological insights come with a terrifying twist.
Let’s see what the stars have in store for you this week. Ready?
Aries: March 21 – April 19
Those middle-of-the-night calls never bring any good news. But that’s what you’ll get this week. Of course its bad news, and yes, you are chosen to come over and solve the catastrophe. You will be in a cranky mood, have a fight with whoever you’re taking along with you on this errand, and reach your destination in a foul mood. As luck would have it, the situation will have been resolved by then, and your coming there was no longer a requirement.
Taurus: April 20 – May 20
This week, you will be tasked with finding missing things, pets, or people. It won’t go so well. You will have no idea why you even agreed to it in the first place. You will end up being successful at the end of the week, but it comes at a cost. You will either have lost your sanity or the thing you were looking for will be damaged.
Gemini: May 21 – June 20
Not everything that glitters is gold. But you do think the opposite when this week you find a charm and think it is a treasure. But of course it isn’t, which is why it was discarded. You will learn some lessons the hard way when you develop a skin rash.
Cancer: June 21 – July 22
Problems at your workplace will keep you occupied this week. An environmental or bio-hazard issue will keep you at your workplace far longer than you want to because you may be contaminated. By the end of the week, the problem will have been resolved by someone from outside the workplace. Not by you. While you may be finally allowed to go home, you will be curious about the green stuff coming out of your ears.
Leo: July 23 – August 22
The path to fame is never easy, but you have it. This week, you will find out just what is behind your newfound fame, and it isn’t hard work. Turns out, someone close to you has been performing rituals to keep you famous, and now you must continue on their behalf after they take a sick leave. The rituals aren’t easy to perform, and you will rethink your decision to stay famous.
Virgo: August 23 – September 22
As a horror fan, you like to believe in supernatural creatures. This week, when you visit a small town, you will suspect the presence of vampires but be convinced only later when one of them visits you. You may start adding garlic to your diet, but this vampire likes garlic. You may end up cutting your visit short, but that doesn’t stop the vampire from stalking you all the way back to your home.
Libra: September 23 – October 22
You have always wanted to live alone. This week, you get a chance to do it. Almost. An impromptu trip will take you away from home and to another place where you will be forced to stay at an overbooked hotel.
You will be averse to the idea of sharing a room with a stranger, but then find out they are never there; only their things are. While you may be contemplating whether this person even exists, their things keep moving around, convincing you that something supernatural is afoot. It isn’t. You’re just losing your mind.
Scorpio: October 23 – November 21
You’ve never been useful when you were alive. Now that you are on the other side, your ghostly powers turn you useful. Your family is happy to be haunted by you, even though they hated your presence when you were alive. You become a hero when you clean up all their messes in the blink of an eye and sort out all their problems. However, you will begin to wonder if you are tied down here only to be the house help, and that will put you in a bad mood, causing some dishes to be shattered.
Sagittarius: November 22 – December 21
You and your colleague do not get along well. So when you find yourself on a literal island after a plane crash, you start fighting instead of working together. This causes a delay in your rescue, and if you both return, you will find your positions have already been filled.
Capricorn: December 22 – January 19
You’re thinking of breaking up or getting a divorce a lot lately. You find that everything your partner does is so annoying that you want them to get out of your life. It is only after your separation that you realize you made a mistake and now want them back. You do briefly meet with them, only to instantly regret getting back together.
Aquarius: January 20 – February 18
You’re annoyed with people who pretend to be mimicking people from the past. It’s not like it’s a costume party or Halloween, so you don’t understand why they keep dressing up as one and behaving as one. It will take time for you to finally realize they are all part of a cult, and you accidentally invited yourself into it, and now can’t get out.
Pisces: February 19 – March 20
You will be trying to attract a crush who comes with really heavy emotional and past baggage. They are clearly not interested in a relationship at the moment, but you are determined to impress them anyway. All your efforts yield is getting other people hurt while you impress your crush, who has already moved away to either someone else or another country.
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