Horror Horoscope: 27th July to 2nd August

 

It’s Horror Horoscope time again, because the cosmos refuses to mind its own business. Here’s what the stars are threatening you with this week.

Aries: March 21 – April 19

Ignoring everyone’s advice, you book an Airbnb. Not only is it expensive, but it has also been double-booked, and the other guest is just as annoyed at having to share their space. You try to get along with them and just before you are about to become buddies, an uninvited guest plays party pooper. The new guest isn’t friendly at all but is nurturing and possessive. You will escape but not get your deposit back. 

Taurus: April 20 – May 20

You have always dreamed of a starry life, but your family strongly opposes your dreams. This week you will get an opportunity to show your talent, but the stars do not show success. This will put you in a bad mood and make you hit back at all those who have not supported you. Your partner will return after their trip and be shocked at the new and transformed version of you. 

Gemini: May 21 – June 20

There are consequences to every action. But you will find a loophole thanks to the new friends you make while on vacation. All you have to do is join their little exclusive group who do a lot of weird things together. At first you will enjoy not taking the blame for any of the petty crimes you commit, but when you see your new friends doing something far worse, you will suddenly grow a conscience that will lead you to want to leave the group. That doesn’t go well for you. 

Cancer: June 21 – July 22

This week you will have settled down in your new house after a relocation. Unfortunately, the ghosts from your past have followed you into your new home. Literally. The only way to get rid of them is to make amends, but you would rather live in guilt cohabiting with the ghosts because it is a far cheaper bargain. 

Leo: July 23 – August 22

 A new job opportunity takes you to a new place where accommodation is free. The only caveat is that you must do exactly what your new employers ask of you. Eventually you will find a way to compromise and live your new life, but by the end of the week you will be shocked to discover that you must now take charge of two highly dependent people. This was not part of your job description, but you didn’t think you had a choice, did you?

Virgo: August 23 – September 22

It’s time to party with your friends. You thought you were all close with each other until one of you gets hurt and begins to blame each other for it. This results in each of you revealing each other’s dirty secrets and spewing venom at each other. None of you want to be friends after that. It is only later that you will find evidence that points to your friend accidentally hurting themselves. All that fighting was for nothing. But at least you don’t have argumentative friends anymore. 

Libra: September 23 – October 22

You and your partner will enjoy your vacation this week. However, an outbreak of a deadly virus will infect your partner, leaving them annoyingly sick. They will bother you for everything and speak incoherently. Before long, you will realize they have turned into a zombie, and the only person who can cure this disease has already left, leaving you stranded in a place with your zombie partner and others just like them. 

Scorpio: October 23 – November 21

If you hate clowns, this is the week you avoid them. Because, as per the planetary positions, clowns all over will hate you too. In fact, the moment they see you, they will be filled with animosity and want to stalk you and hurt your loved ones. You will find a way to get rid of them, but it comes at a cost of you losing your favorite item. However, the stars show you will not be rid of clowns forever. They will come after you repeatedly. 

Sagittarius: November 22 – December 21

Urban legends are real, and you and your friends will find it the hard way this week. A prank will lead to you and your friends being stalked by a demon who will attack each of you in your own homes. However, you will escape your house and believe you are safe. The stars suggest that staying in your house is the safest choice. But you will be compelled to do the opposite because of another planet moving across the charts that wants to spell trouble for you. 

Capricorn: December 22 – January 19

You love investigating and researching things, which is why when you come across a local urban legend, you jump at the chance to find out all that you can. The locals will initially help you until you realize that they have all been lying to you. The legend is absolutely true, and they all belong to a cult which worships a demonic entity, and you are the sacrifice. By this time, you are so exhausted you just want to be part of the group and will give in.

Aquarius: January 20 – February 18

This week it is all about family visits. While you are excited to meet your sibling and their children, a natural disaster becomes a catalyst in the horrific events that follow. The children end up finding a book they were not supposed to read from, your sibling begins to act strangely, and soon enough the entire family turns into a mutated monster. Luckily, your carpentry skills will save you, but evil never completely dies, does it? 

Pisces: February 19 – March 20

This is not the week to play pranks according to the planet transits. But the stars decide to force you to play a mean prank on someone anyway just because you hold them accountable for something wrong that went in your life. Unfortunately, the prank backfires, and you end up facing the consequences of your deeds. The consequences are not very nice. 

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