Horror Horoscope-- 2nd November to 8th November

 

It’s Horror Horoscope time again, because the cosmos refuses to mind its own business. Here’s what the stars are threatening you with this week.

Aries: March 21 – April 19

You will venture out in the woods even though the locals, online reviews, and your loved ones remind you of the urban legend. But you are more interested in proving them wrong than getting exercise. Of course they will turn out to be right. You will be mercilessly stalked by a mythical creature. You survive only because an elderly person in a cave comes to your aid with advice. 

Taurus: April 20 – May 20

Looking for some alone time, you rent a room at a hotel only to realize that everyone in the hotel knows your name, and once it’s time to check out, you aren’t allowed to leave. Turns out you booked a room in a haunted hotel. All the guests are dead, and they want you to solve all of their problems because you can see them. You will lose your real-world job but gain a new position as a medium. 

Gemini: May 21 – June 20

Your twin will start behaving strangely after coming back from a trip. You will dismiss it first as eccentricity until you see them feasting on raw meat. Convinced that they are possessed, you will call an exorcist only to be told you have no twin and it is you who is going crazy. 

Cancer: June 21 – July 22

A trip to the beach goes wrong when you are bitten by a strange creature. You will use whatever antiseptic you have at hand until you wake up at night to discover a strange rash and gills. You are slowly turning into a fish. On the bright side, you get to live on a beach forever. 

Leo: July 23 – August 22 

You can’t get enough of coffee this week. Long hours at work have caused you to give up on your normal routine and embrace the coffee culture. However, the lack of sleep will induce hallucinations that will make you wonder what is real and what is not. Giving up coffee can calm down your nervous system, but you keep rewarding yourself with coffee every time. 

Virgo: August 23 – September 22

A letter from a distant relative will get you excited since they are wealthy, and although you have never met them, you will be invited to dinner. Except, once you reach there, you will be told of the family heritage that takes you by surprise. You thought you were human. You are not. 

Libra: September 23 – October 22

It’s game night with the friends this week. There is also an astronomical phenomenon taking place, but that doesn’t deter you. Soon the lights will go out, your friends will argue, and you can’t find candles. When you go to borrow from the neighbors, you’ll find that they look a lot like you. Your friends get mixed up with the doppelgangers, and now no one knows who is the original and who are the duplicates. But your friend group survives as some of them gain new personalities. 

Scorpio: October 23 – November 21

You go to see a magic show and have a loved one called up on stage for a trick. Things go wrong when your loved one doesn’t return after a disappearing act. The magician is astounded too. The police cannot help, and no one knows where your loved one went. By the end of the week, you will find them casually grocery shopping. It was just a ruse to break up with you. 

Sagittarius: November 22 – December 21

You and your team decide to get some cleaning done. Unfortunately, it is at a haunted hospital. You and your team are most likely going to find yourselves strapped up and operated on by a surgical team. Some of you may survive. 

Capricorn: December 22 – January 19

You and your friend get into an accident. While all of you are unhurt, the person you hit isn’t. However, you will decide to cover it up rather than confess. Shortly after, you will experience stalking and threatening notes left for you. By the end of the week, it will be revealed that the accident victim was alive all along and, rather than going to a hospital, wanted to plot revenge. 

Aquarius: January 20 – February 18

A new shopping mall will make you plan a weekend trip. There are plenty of shops and cafes for you to spend time in. One of the stores will catch your eye because of the unusual objects they sell. You will be intrigued, but more so by the salespeople. By the end of the week, you will be hired by them and also inducted into their cult. 

Pisces: February 19 – March 20

People will keep staring at you this week. While it is annoying at first, you quickly realize that they are not appreciating your beauty. Rather, they are watching your every move, judging. By the end of the week, you will realize that they have been stalking you because they want to sacrifice you to their cult leader. Luckily, you don’t fit all the requirements and will be rejected by them.