Skip to main content

What happened then

I thought I would never talk about what happened a few months ago and that I would try and move past it and live in the present.  Then I saw this quote on Facebook about you being in charge of your own decisions and the consequences of that. I cannot remember the exact quote but it was something about your problems being your fault.
My reaction? REALLY!!!!! ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!!!
Of course I used expletives while saying that but I’m not about to put it here on my “sacred” blog.
My point is that there is no way we are responsible for what happens to us. We cannot even try to put up a brave face sometimes when this horrible thing happens that shatters everything inside us.
I went through a phase that I wasn’t in control of. I didn’t decide to go through it. When I tried to fight, I was made to lose because that was what the time was at that time. No matter what I did, I failed and I was at a point that everything looked bleak and hopeless. I tried to be happy, in fact I got up every day and told myself: Today I’ll be happy.
Guess what? Me deciding that did nothing- zilch! Things would keep going wrong and then a lot worse until it broke me completely. All I had was the hope that someday it would get better.
The universe does not work according to what we want. If it did, I would have never let myself go through something so terrible that it would hurt me and break me at the same time. I wouldn't have allowed some people to come into my life and make me helpless. I wouldn't have let myself be hurt by the words they said and the things they did.
I wouldn't have let myself be in a position where I just broke down. This wasn't and isn't the life I have envisioned for myself.

I can choose to wish happy things but I lack the control and ability to do it. I want nice things to happen to me, to achieve success and be appreciated. But all this can happen with a bit of talent and hard work and a large amount of luck. Loads of it! 

Comments

  1. Hello, we are year one students from Community College of City University of Hong Kong. We are major in translation and interpretation. As we are doing a project about translating a short story in English into Chinese, we would like to ask for your permission to translate your story"Tina's Gimmick".
    Also, we wonder if there is any printed version of your story?And has your story been translated into Chinese before?Finally, will there be any Chinese version of your story within this year?Because we need to make sure there is no Chinese version of "Tina's Gimmick" when we are doing the project.Sorry for bothering you.
    Thank you for your kind attention. We look forward to hearing from you soon:)
    Chim, Sharon, Prudence, Eleanor

    ReplyDelete
  2. Would you mind to contavt me through chimchimchim64@gmail.com?thank you:)

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Limehouse Golem- My take on the movie with spoilers!

If like me, you’ve read hundreds of mysteries and enthused about Sherlock Holmes tales, THE LIMEHOUSE GOLEM is actually pretty predictable.
Set in the Victorian Era, it promises to instill dear in you. Before Jack the Ripper, there was Golem- such is the tagline and you do want it to be the kind of movie that keeps you guessing until the very end as to the true identity of the killer. Unlike the Jack the Ripper legend, Golem is easily recognizable in the very first instance the character is introduced.
The hunger in the eyes, the madness to carve a name on stone, not ice- all of it points towards their murderous intentions.
The story is essentially about Elizabeth Cree and how she leaves behind a tragic, impoverished life to become someone. She finds her secret talents in a music hall where plays are held, led by Dan Leno, an actor who doesn’t mind cross-dressing. He runs the hall with the help of Elizabeth’s “uncle” who has a twisted secret of his own.
When Elizabeth’s husband is fo…

Marrowbone-- my take on the movie with spoilers!

Marrowbone is one of those movies that delivers shocks and surprises. From the outside, it looks like a period drama. But that’s only the first scene.
We are introduced to the Marrowbones- a family consisting of a mother and four children (three boys and a girl). They move into a new house, actually a manor, and as they enter, the mother tells them one simple thing- the minute they cross the threshold, they leave the past behind.
Immediately we are made curious as to what this seemingly ordinary family must have gone through. What exactly was the mother alluding to? Never a dull moment, the scene shifts to the introduction of Allie, a very important character in the movie as we find out later. Afterward, we are shown the mother to be on her deathbed, leaving her children with only a letter detailing the roles they must undertake.
Jack, the eldest, makes a pact with his siblings that nothing will ever separate them. In the next scene, the mother is buried. Jane is in the mother’s room…

Still/Born-- My take on the movie with spoilers!

I have often wondered why is it that in a horror movie, building family drama is given more importance over providing adequate scares.
While watching Still/Born, it finally hit me from the very first scene.
It's because real life is far scarier than any ghost or demon.
You could do everything right- plan everything ahead, push yourself out of bed every morning and strive to work and persist, nevertheless, you would still end up losing if it is written in your destiny.
A battle with destiny can never be won.
It is this bleak message that I felt was the key element of this movie.
A mother was supposed to give birth to twin boys. A joyous occasion, right? But nope, one of them. Is stillborn.
She goes into depression but still pushes herself to stay happy for the sake of her living son and husband. She even takes her medications and goes to therapy. Does that work for her? Nope.
She does whatever it takes to save her son, goes crazy in the process, is ready to fight a demonic figure. Does she…